Ride of a lifetime

I think (or, more accurately, I like to believe) that every now and then all of us start to ask ourselves, “What happened? I had this idea of what my life would be like but somewhere along the way, I lost control of the process, and it just didn’t turn out like I imagined.”
Similarly, I sometimes wonder if there are people whose lives turned out exactly the way they thought they would. If any of you, gentle readers, belong to this very select group, please don’t tell me about it. It may be a matter of living in a fool’s paradise, but I prefer to believe that everybody else is just as much in the dark about why things turned out they way they did as I am.
See if this sounds in any way familiar to you on a personal level. When I was young, I had this notion, perhaps you might even call it a premonition, that I would do or achieve something very special and rare. Perhaps it was brought on by my mother always telling me how special I was.
But then, mothers do say things like that, don’t they? I think it’s part of the job description.
I remember telling my high school girl friend that I felt I was destined, if not for greatness, at the very least some peculiarly exalted fate. Maybe that’s why I did some of the crazy things I did as a young man. I also remember my girl friend telling me she felt I was destined for the looney bin. In the final analysis, she was closer to being right than I was.
Anyway, as time went on this notion of my specialness gradually began to wain until at last I grasped the disappointing reality that I was actually very ordinary, and not that different from anybody else. Perhaps this is part of the maturation process and the kind of people we become depends on how we react to what happens as compared to what we expected..
Think of it as buying a ticket on what is supposed to be a thrill ride, like a really big roller coaster. You pay an exorbitant amount of money for the ticket, then you wait in line forever to just get a seat on the ride. While waiting you are subjected to all manner of indignities and tribulations, but you tell yourself that the ride will be worth it. Slowly the ride takes off and you keep waiting for that exhilarating rush of adrenaline as the ride takes control of your body and mind and delivers what it promised, namely a big thrill.
Then suddenly the ride grinds to a halt and some dippy looking kid in a silly uniform is helping you out of your seat and thanking you, unconvincingly of course, for going on the “ride of a lifetime.”
The thing about thrill rides is, they never last very long. Not even the really thrilling ones. Not long after after you get on, you have to get off. Then go through that agonizing wait in line again just to take another ride.
If you’re like me, gentle readers, you thought you were getting on a thrill ride, but what you got aboard was a river boat cruise. Sometimes the water got a little rough, and sometimes it was so frustrating you thought you’d go out of your skull, and sometimes it was just plain boring. But as you come to the realization that you’re nearer the end than the beginning, you remember that there has been some very nice scenery along the way, and some of the on-board entertainment was pretty good. And maybe you got a better deal than the guys who did end up on the thrill ride after all.